In our previous article, “Choosing Power,” we shared a praxis (Notice, Discern, Articulate, Decide) that helps us interrupt the automatic ways we relate to power.

To aid us in naming power, we have identified 4 Formations of Power that illustrate how power can be structured, designed, and used. The default formation, the one that dominates all others, is Power-Over. When we are not intentional about how we want power to be formed, we will always go back to Power-Over.

Below we share our Working Definitions for Power-Over as well as three Formations that, when chosen intentionally, can help us move away from Power-Over as default. We have also included Key Features for each formation, given Examples in how they are used, and provided Guiding Questions to Spot them.

We believe that naming power and choosing power are antidotes to the feelings of powerlessness we feel today. We hope that these Formations help you in becoming more aware and intentional of power in your everyday lives and relationships.

Power-Over: Power to Dominate & Annihilate

Working Definition:

Power-Over is using power to dominate, control, or annihilate. It decides for others, without their consent, and actively suppresses their ability to respond or resist.

Key Features:

• No meaningful consent from those impacted

• Secrecy, manipulation, or coercion are common tactics

• Often justified by narratives of “deservingness” (who is “worthy” of life, safety, or resources)

• Shows up at systemic and interpersonal levels

Examples:

• A government deciding which communities are “sacrifice zones” for pollution, without any say from residents.

• Policing and carceral systems that literally decide who lives, who dies, and whose lives are disposable.

• An abuser isolating a partner from community, resources, and information.

• Cultural gatekeepers who use mobbing, blacklisting, or sanctions to punish dissent.

Guiding Questions to Spot Power-Over:

• Who decides who lives, who dies, or whose life is made unlivable?

• Who cannot say no without serious harm?

• What happens to people who disagree or resist?

• What information is withheld, distorted, or weaponized?

• Is it proposed by a billionaire?

Naming Power-Over clearly aids us in organizing against it and reducing its reach where and when we can.

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Power-Above: Top-Down Decision Making

Working Definition:

Power-Above is a top-down structure where a person or small group makes decisions that affect others. Those impacted may be able to advise, inform, or appeal, but they do not ultimately decide.

Key Features:

• Decisions flow downward

• Information and feedback flow upward

• There may be consultation, but not shared decision-making

• Can provide clarity and speed, but easily slides into Power-Over if unchecked

Examples:

• A director or ED making final decisions after staff and community give input.

• A judge making a ruling after hearing arguments from both sides.

• An emergency response where a designated lead decides quickly for safety reasons.

Guiding Questions to Spot Power-Above:

• Who has the formal authority to decide?

• Can those impacted offer input? Is that input ever able to change the outcome?

• Is it clear when and why this top-down structure is being used?

• Where does accountability reside within the relationships?

• Are decision-makers held accountable to those impacted?

Power-Above is often the “default” structure in institutions: it can be harmful, but it can also be functional or even necessary in certain contexts—if it is transparent, limited, and accountable. If unexamined, it drifts toward Power-Over.

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Power-Below: Representational & Advocacy Power

Working Definition:

Power-Below is using power to advocate or act on behalf of others, ideally with their knowledge, consent, and direction. It’s representational: someone or some group says, “We will speak, negotiate, or decide for you, grounded in what you’ve asked us to do.”

Key Features:

• Based on a relationship and a level of consent

• Meant to be in service of others’ needs, not to replace them indefinitely

• Works best when it builds others’ capacity to act for themselves over time

• Easily drifts into paternalism (“we know what’s best for you”) if not checked

Examples:

• A tenant organizer speaking at City Hall on behalf of tenants who helped shape the testimony but can’t all be present.

• A union steward negotiating a contract based on members’ votes and priorities.

• A cultural worker using their institutional access to secure resources specifically for communities who asked for that support.

Guiding Questions to Spot (or strengthen) Power-Below:

• Who asked you to speak or act for them? How was consent facilitated?

• How are you reporting back and staying accountable?

• What pathways are you creating for people to advocate for themselves over time?

• Where might “advocacy” be slipping into saviorism, paternalism, or control?

Power-Below is often necessary—especially when systems are designed to exclude certain people, and it asks us to keep consent, accountability, and capacity-building at the center.

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Power-With: Collective & Relational Power

Working Definition:

Power-With is the power we build together in relationship. It’s grounded in shared purpose, mutual consent, and co-created structure. No one is above or over; instead, people hold Power-With each other. Imagine a lava lamp where the liquid continually shifts but the contain still holds.

Key Features:

• Everyone consents to be part of building power together

• Decision-making is shared, transparent, and adaptable

• Allows for autonomous action within shared purpose and agreements

• Requires time, trust, and continuous communication

Examples:

• A collective where members co-create processes, share facilitation, and rotate roles.

• A coalition that defines shared principles and lets each group act autonomously while coordinating strategy.

• Community assemblies where decisions are made through participatory processes (e.g. facilitated dialogue, consensus / modified consensus, the “law of two feet”, open space agenda setting, etc.).

Guiding Questions to Cultivate Power-With:

• Who decides:

  • who decides?

  • what needs to be decided on?

  • how decisions will be made?

• Do all gathered understand:

  • what is being discussed?

  • that they are decision makers?

  • how decisions, if any, will be made, and what is specifically being decided on?

• How are you checking your biases?

• What agreements help us move through conflict without defaulting to Power-Over?

• How will we share information, skills, and resources so more people can act?

Power-With is not automatically “gentle” or “easy.” It can be messy, slow, and uncomfortable. But it is one of the few forms of power that strengthens everyone involved and expands what’s possible beyond any individual.

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Some Final Questions & Reflections

We would love to hear from YOU! Below are a few questions we are curious about. Answer them in the COMMENTS or share your reflections, inspirations, and stories.

• How are you naming and choosing power in your organizations, groups, and everyday lives?

• What do you think about these definitions? Anything we missed? Anything that made you go, “Ah ha”?

• Do you have examples or stories of any of these Formations?

These Four Formations of Power help us in our daily lives, in our groups, and in the relationship between us. We tend towards choosing Power-With because it is the closest Formation to what we know to be the path towards liberation. We also know Power-Above and Power-Below have their uses and functions, especially during times of crisis, emergency response, and advocacy.

We hope that by sharing language about these Four Formations, you have ways of naming and choosing Power in your everyday lives, groups, and organizations.

What’s often missing? An intentional practice that aids us in slowing down so we can see how power is operating in, through, and around us.

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That’s where Notice, Discern, Articulate, Decide comes in. This is a simple, repeatable framework for interrupting the automatic ways we relate to power—whether that’s in an arts organization, a cultural center, a labor local, a collective, or our own families. Instead of assuming we’re powerless, or assuming we’re “the good ones” who couldn’t possibly be reproducing harm, this practice asks us to move more slowly and more honestly. It’s not a magic fix. It’s a way of building muscle: the muscle of seeing power clearly, making meaning together, naming what’s really going on, and then choosing how to act.

Notice is the first step, and it’s about observation without rushing to judgment or solutions. We ask: What is actually happening here? Who is speaking and who isn’t? Who has access to information? Who gets to decide how money, space, time, or attention are used? How does this feel in my body—in my nervous system—in this room? Noticing is about patterns, not just moments. That might look like realizing that decisions always get finalized in side conversations with the same two people, or that funders are consistently centered onstage while communities are treated as an afterthought. It might also mean noticing where we ourselves tend to grab control, shut down, or disappear when conflict surfaces.

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Once we have something to notice, we move to Discern. Here we ask: What does what I’m noticing mean? Discernment is where we connect dots between individual behavior and larger systems—white supremacy, anti-Blackness, class hierarchy, homophobia, transphobia, ableism, colonial logics, and more. We might discern that what looks like “efficiency” is actually power being hoarded at the top. Or that what’s being called “neutral” policy is replicating racist or anti-Black outcomes. Discernment also asks, Is this the right use of power in this moment? Sometimes decisive, top-down action might be necessary (for example, in an immediate safety concern). Other times, the same pattern is a red flag that we’re reproducing the very dynamics we say we’re fighting.

Articulate is the step where we bring what we’re seeing and sensing into shared language. This is where we risk saying out loud, “It feels like decisions are being made without us,” or, “I’m noticing that funders are being treated like friends, but they are actually accountable to the mayor’s office, not to this community.” Articulation can happen in many forms—meeting comments, emails, one-on-one conversations, public statements—but the key is that we name the dynamics rather than leaving them as a vague unease or private resentment. Naming is a small but powerful act: it takes something that feels personal and turns it into something we can examine together. It also reveals where there is shared experience and where there is disagreement, which is crucial for honest collective work.

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Finally, we Decide. Decision is where we move from “this is what’s happening” to “this is what we’re going to do about it.” That might be as small as deciding to ask a clarifying question in the next meeting, or as large as deciding to redesign a governance structure, refuse a grant, call out misconduct, or organize collectively. Decide asks: Given what we’ve noticed, discerned, and articulated, what risks are we willing to take? What boundaries do we need? What solidarities can we deepen? What experiments in action can we try? Importantly, deciding doesn’t guarantee control over outcomes. What it does is re-root us in participation instead of passivity. We may not dictate the whole system, but we can choose our stance within it.

Using Notice, Discern, Articulate, Decide as an ongoing practice, rather than a one-time exercise, is a way to resist the contraction of imagination and possibility that authoritarianism depends on. Fascism and austerity work by making us feel small, isolated, and grateful for crumbs. This framework slows us down enough to see that power is not only “out there” in city hall or a boardroom; it’s also moving through our agendas, our facilitation choices, our hiring practices, our invitations, our silences. When we practice noticing, discerning, articulating, and deciding—in our organizations, our collaborations, and our own lives—we start to reclaim some of that ground. We’re not just reacting to change; we’re understanding our place within it and choosing how we want to move.

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One of my earliest political memories is standing with my dad on a picket line in downtown Minneapolis. He worked produce at a union grocery store, and Whole Foods was moving in, refusing to unionize. I was a teenager, but I understood enough: here was a company building its business model on breaking the very thing that gave my father dignity and protection.

From that moment, I started to understand that our economic choices are political choices—especially around something as fundamental as food. Back then, a grocery store was either a co-op or union. Whole Foods helped change that. Today, the landscape is far murkier, and many of the union groceries near me have been gutted, while big-box stores and boutique markets thrive. The terrain of “doing the right thing” is no longer simple, if it ever was.

But this isn’t just a story about unions and grocery stores. It’s a story about fear—and what we do with it.

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When Fear Shows You Who You Are

In high school, my Catholic schooling wrapped “service” in the language of charity: help “the less fortunate.” I didn’t yet have the language to critique that framework. So I went along. I volunteered at soup kitchens and in programs with unhoused gay, queer, and trans youth in Minneapolis.

I came into those spaces carrying a quiet arrogance: white, suburban, Catholic, close enough to wealth to feel its comfort even if we didn’t fully have it. I saw myself as a helper, a giver. But being in rooms full of peers my own age, living on the street in Minnesota winters, shattered my understanding of class and safety.

How could someone like me—same age, same city—be surviving outside in subzero temperatures, while I went home to warmth?

That question lodged itself inside me.

Later, when I came out in St. Paul, that question became a warning. Coming out meant risking everything: family, housing, church, and whatever future had been scripted for me. I was terrified—not in an abstract way, but in a very concrete, “I could end up homeless” way. I had seen what that looked like. I knew it wasn’t hypothetical.

Fear pushed me to seek solidarity with people who didn’t look like me and didn’t share my background. That’s how I connected with folks like Stacey, a young Black man from North Minneapolis, and Lorena, a Mexican student who would later come out as queer.

One day, in a moment etched into my marrow, Stacey looked me dead in the eye and said to me, “You seem kind of racist. Go work on that.”

No roadmap. No reading list. Just a mirror.

I was already terrified—of being queer, of being unhoused, of being excommunicated from everything that raised me. And now I had to face the possibility that I was also racist, that my “good intentions” were soaked in bias and entitlement.

Fear was no longer something happening around me. Fear was now me.

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Fear as a Doorway, Not a Wall

I didn’t know what “go work on that” meant. But I knew how to use a library.

So I sat in the stacks, day after day, pulling cards from the catalog, tracing keywords like “race,” “racism,” “prejudice.” I found books like The Nature of Prejudice and Peggy McIntosh’s “Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack.” I followed footnotes to Langston Hughes, Sojourner Truth, Malcolm X. I moved beyond the safe, sanitized version of Martin Luther King Jr. we were taught in school and listened to his speech, Beyond Vietnam — A Time to Break Silence.

I wasn’t doing this out of academic curiosity. I was doing it to survive.

I understood, instinctively, that my survival as a queer person in this country was bound up with understanding race and racism, with confronting my own internalized White Supremacy, with seeing how the systems I benefited from were built through the subjugation of others.

Fear pushed me into that library.

But once I was there, fear became something else: a compass. It kept asking:

• What are you afraid to see about yourself?

• What are you afraid to admit about your country?

• What truths terrify you enough that you’d rather look away?

The more honestly I followed those questions, the less abstract “liberation” became. It wasn’t a slogan. It was a daily, uncomfortable practice of turning toward what I feared, letting it change me.

This Country Is Terrified of Its Own Reflection

I now live in San Francisco, on Yelamu, surrounded by imperfect, brilliant communities of Black, Indigenous, Latinx, queer, trans, non-binary, poor, unhoused, disabled comrades, neighbors, and beloveds. My life is possible because so many people—many of them not white, not cis, not safely housed—have extended care, critique, and courage toward me.

When I look at the United States, I see a country that refuses to do what I was forced to do in that library: to turn toward its own terror and contradictions.

We love to recite the Declaration of Independence, the Constitution, the Bill of Rights as if they are sacred scripture. But this country is not those texts. This country is the policies and laws written in their wake—policies that have consistently and deliberately subjugated, dispossessed, and exterminated Black people, Indigenous peoples, and people across the globe: Vietnamese, Koreans, Iraqis, Iranians, Palestinians, Congolese, Sudanese, and so many others.

The state’s function has always been Power-Over: to control, to discipline, to contain. It is terrified of the people—terrified of our capacity to organize, to care for one another outside its logic, to refuse the narrow futures it offers.

And that terror shows up on our streets: in policing, in houselessness, in medical neglect, in borders, in war. The state is executing people in front of us, directly and indirectly, every single day.

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Choosing Power-With Rather Than Power-Over

I don’t write this from a moral pedestal. I still buy food that would have made my union dad furious. I still live inside systems I oppose. The grocery stores that once were clear sites of solidarity have, in many cases, been gutted by the very forces he protested against. The choices are more complicated now.

But I can choose to shop at local markets, talk with workers, support farmers’ markets, build relationships rather than transactions. I can choose to be accountable when I am called in or called out. I can choose to stay in community even when it’s uncomfortable.

These are not perfect choices. They are partial, messy, human. And yet they matter, because they’re rooted in a different orientation: Power-With, not Power-Over.

Liberation, as I understand it now, isn’t a fixed destination. It’s a continual practice of:

• Turning toward our fears instead of letting them harden into walls,

• Letting critique—especially from those most impacted—actually transform us,

• Unlearning the stories we were raised with about who is “deserving,” who is “normal,” who is “dangerous,” who is “less,”

• Building and sustaining ways of caring for each other that do not rely on the state’s permission or control.

An Invitation: Be Constantly Fearful

In some ways, I am asking you to be constantly fearful—but not in the way this country trains us to be. Not fearful of your neighbor, or of Blackness, or of queerness, or of migration, or of poverty.

Instead, fearful of your own complacency. Fearful of the harm you might be doing without examining it. Fearful of turning away when your communities need you to turn towards. Because if we can learn to sit with that fear, to listen to it, to let it guide us deeper into truth rather than further into denial, something shifts. Fear stops being a weapon used to isolate us and becomes a doorway into collective liberation.

The path to liberation, as I live it, is not fearless. It is full of fear. But it is also full of beloveds, of comrades, of communities that hold each other through that fear, that insist another reality is already here, being co-created in kitchens, streets, libraries, encampments, backyards, and living rooms.

We are making that future—not someday, but right now. Outside of the state.

With and for each other.

And that, to me, is what makes all this fear not just bearable, but necessary.

One privilege we (Crystal Mason and Jason Wyman) share is being Queer of gender and sexuality. This privilege is a core part of both of our identities, and it has shaped (and still shapes) how we move and make meaning of this world (and our place(s) within it.) At its core is a deep curiosity about who we are, how we know or believe what we know or believe, and who we want to become. The privilege therewithin is an orientation towards unlearning, a commitment to transforming, and, ultimately, comfort with / in The Unknown.

This is apparent in our work and praxis over the past decade. Our first co-creation was A Feast of Dreams at the Red Poppy Art House, which gathered an intergenerational, multi-disciplinary community of trans, queer, and non-binary artists. It was spurred by two things. One was a combination of loss and grief mixed with the election of Trump in 2016, which was clouding visions, dreams, and futures (Crystal.) The other was an artist-in-residency integrating personal artistic and healing practices into the overall cultivation and development of the Red Poppy Art House through the production of small feasts that engage culturally-specific communities (Jason.) To conjure our Feast, we began with conversation rooted in inquiry: Who are we? Who are we gathering? How are we gathering? Why? What is culturally significant or important to us, individually and collectively? How does this all become reality in ways that affirm and reinforce who we want, need, and desire to be?

We did not anticipate where we might go. Instead, we conversed, and we allowed ourselves, each other, and our path to be changed by the stories, truths, dreams, and realities shared between us. As a result, this Feast became a seed, which we have cultivated into our Tree of Change, a Praxis of Culture Tending.

Recently, we’ve noticed in our work with our clients and our extended, intersectional communities a need for ways to question what is being forced down our throats so we may better discern actions, behaviors, and values that can carry us towards more liberatory futures. Unlearning and transforming are critical skills that have aided us on our paths (personally and collectively) towards liberation, so we took time at the end of 2025 to reflect upon our own decade of co-creation and discern / articulate a Queer Practice of Unlearning and Transforming. In other words, how we (try to) remain as comfortable as possible in / with The Unknown.

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Below are Six Guides that distill a decade of co-creation into an order / process that broadly articulates our praxis. These are not rules. Nor are they etched in stone. Rather, our Six Guides reflect a specific moment in time (December 2025 to January 2026) where we are looking both backwards and forwards. We believe they may offer insight for others, like us, who are currently facing immense change within our institutions, social programs, communities, neighborhoods, families, streets, formations, and movements.

The Unknown is Present, and in The Unknown Power-Over tries its best to dominate Us All. An antidote to Power-Over is to cultivate Power-With. So please read, reflect, adapt, adopt, edit, and iterate upon these Six Guides. Don’t just swallow them whole. What affirms your understanding? What challenges you? What do you reject outright? What did we miss? What are your own Guides to Unlearning and Transforming?

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Six Guides for Unlearning & Transforming

Ground in Humility, Curiosity, and Care. Center Intersectionality, Complexity, and Pluralism.

• Admit that I don’t know everything about everyone, even people I consider to be in my community.

• Be able to hold multiple things as true, or letting go of “The One True Story.”

• Ask, “Is there something that I am missing?”

• Read, study, grapple with the words and works of others who have also (and already) grapple(ed) with similar things, issues, politics, movements.

Acknowledge Assumptions (aka Bias). Write Them Down.

• Name and notice how your access(es) to privilege and power shape your understanding and experiences of privilege and power.

• Acknowledge that what I / you thought I / you knew or believed might be ill-informed.

• Write down what you think should happen. Then, tear it up and throw it away.

Create Structures, Processes, and Tactics to Surface Contradictions. Collect Inputs, Information, and Feedback.

• Test assumptions with trusted friends, beloveds, and comrades.

• Identify who is historically / systematically left out and create culturally-specific mechanisms for inclusion and involvement.

• Create opportunities for feedback (such as one-on-ones, surveys, small group conversations, opening / closing circles, etc.).

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Notice Resistances and Contradictions. Recognize Personal Reactions.

• Frequently check in with your body. How is your breathing? Have you eaten? Where might there be tension? What can you do, if anything, in the moment to notice feelings, senses, and sensations?

• Bring awareness (and try to keep at bay judgement) to dissonances, discomforts, conflicts, contradictions, harms.

• Remain open to communicating what is surfacing even when you might not have all the words or understanding.

Ask, How Does Emerging Data, Stories, and Experiences Strengthen, Reinforce, Challenge, or Undermine Your Assumptions? Shift from Reacting to Reflecting to Incorporating to Adapting.

• Use visualization / dreaming to imagine where new information, stories, data, or experiences could fit into, expand, or change your current understandings, worldview, or beliefs.

• Shift goals, outcomes, priorities, strategies, and directions based on emerging data, stories, and experiences.

• Reflect on whose stories and experiences have been prioritized, centered, or included. Acknowledge gaps between intended audiences / groups and present realities. Make a plan to address those gaps.

Write a New Narrative, One That Unflattens Perspectives, Affirms Cultural Nuances, and More Accurately Reflects Our Multidimensional World(s).

• Remember all stories start with a single sentence. And some are even only a sentence.

• Embrace all forms of media, art, and communication that meets people where they are to tell stories that reveal and affirm multiple perspectives.

• Celebrate change as movement towards desired futures that is made present by Us All, here and now.

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Thursdays Are for Queers & Comrades at 465 Collective

Thursdays are for Queers & Comrades at 465 Collective, located at 465 SVN in Yelamu / San Francisco. Every Thursday from 5:30pm to 7:30pm we have Queer Art Club taking over the back gallery for loosely coordinated art activities and lots of supplies on hand to do your own thing. Then every week from 7pm to 9pm we have a different Club taking over the Lounge for some casual peer arts, culture, and political education. It’s for the whole queer & trans & nonbinary family!

In a world shaped by overlapping crises—political, ecological, economic, and spiritual—the ways we gather matter as much as what we gather for. Meetings, workshops, community circles, and coalitions are not neutral spaces; they are sites where power is either hoarded or shared, where people are either extracted from or tended to. Facilitation for the Future asks a simple but profound question: How do we design and hold spaces that share power with, rather than exert power over?

Through our work in Culture Tending Collective and our recent workshop on Facilitation for the Future, we’ve been exploring a (a) meta-structure that can apply to almost any kind of gathering: (b) opening, (c)orientation, (d) main course, and (e) closing, with intentional (f) pre-work and (g) debrief wrapped around the whole thing. Within this structure, we look at how culture, access, racial equity, and organizational realities intersect and interact—because the way you open a space, the information you share ahead of time, the choices you make about who speaks and how decisions get made, all quietly answer the question: Who is this space really for?

What emerged from the workshop, in conversation with participants, is not a rigid methodology but a set of principles—living practices—for facilitators who want to tend culture, redistribute power, and design gatherings that are more aligned with our missions, visions, and values. This article shares those principles and offers a framework for anyone who is asking: How can my facilitation help communities not just survive the present, but practice the futures we long for?

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Principles for Facilitation for the Future

(A) Meta-Structure

Slow Down to Go Far

Urgency is a tool of domination. Slowing down builds collective clarity, distributes leadership, and reduces rework.

Practices:

• Protect spaciousness for reflection

• Avoid overpacked agendas

• Trust that relational time supports more effective action later

Facilitation Is Shared — Not Solely the Facilitator’s Job

While facilitators guide the container, power is held collectively.
Everyone contributes to maintaining agreements, culture, and care.

Practices:

• Name roles clearly

• Invite shared responsibility for holding the space

• Ask participants to support one another in staying aligned with agreements

Maintain the Integrity of the Circle

Not every space is for everyone. Protecting the health of the container is more important than accommodating disruptive or harmful behavior.

Practices:

• Address harm early

• Center the safety and dignity of the group

• Use agreements as a compass, not decoration

• Remember: accountability is a form of care

Honor Emotion, Body, and Spirit as Sources of Wisdom

People do their best thinking when their nervous systems feel regulated and respected.

Practices:

• Use somatics, grounding, or breath

• Acknowledge emotional responses as valid

• Make room for the human, not only the task

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(B) Opening

Open with Intention, Not Urgency

How you begin a gathering shapes everything that follows. Strong openings create grounding, connection, and clarity — the antidotes to rushing, confusion, and power-over dynamics.

Practices:

• Allow arrival time

• Offer check-ins or grounding

• Make space for people to land as themselves

(C) Orientation

Orient People Toward Shared Purpose and Shared Power

People need to know where they are, how decisions get made, and what agreements hold the space. Clarity diminishes harm and increases belonging.

Practices:

• Present or co-create agreements

• Name decision-making processes

• Provide simple tools for addressing harm (e.g., Ouch/Oops)

• Share values, positionality, and context

(D) Main Course

Design With — Not For — the People in the Room

Accessibility, rhythm, pacing, and logistics are not neutral. They are political choices that determine who can meaningfully participate.

Practices:

• Consider access (physical, emotional, economic, cultural)

• Choose time, space, and pacing based on who you are gathering

• Ask what participants need to feel included, safe enough, and in their power

(E) Closing

Close with Care and Transition

Closings help people integrate what happened, return to themselves, and re-enter the wider world with intention.

Practices:

• Offer reflection, harvest, or meaning-making

• Clarify next steps

• Celebrate contributions

• Acknowledge the shift from the container back into daily life

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(F) Pre-Work

Practice Transparent Information Sharing

Information hoarding is a tool of power-over. Transparency builds trust, shared understanding, and collective decision-making capacity.

Practices:

• Share agendas, notes, timelines, and expectations

• Name constraints and context

• Document decisions and make them accessible

(G) Debrief

Design for Continual Becoming

Facilitation is a growth practice — for the facilitator and the group. Groups evolve. Culture evolves. We evolve.

Practices:

• Reflect on what worked and what didn’t

• Adjust pacing and structure as needs change

• Invite feedback

• Remain open, curious, and willing to shift

Founding Members of Culture Tending Commons and Co-Founders of Tree of Change, Crystal Mason and Jason Wyman, sit down and talk about their upcoming workshop, Facilitation for the Future, happening on Saturday, December 6 from 10am to 2:30pm PT via Zoom. Spots are still available, so sign up today.

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CRYSTAL MASON:

One of the reasons we chose Facilitation for the Future as the title is because we believe that that many, if not all, of our institutions are or are beginning to fail us. We believe that we need to dream in this moment because we know we have to be looking towards the future. We want to create a future where we can get together across differences and actually be able to discuss important things that help move our movements and the things we feel are important forward. And we think it’s important that people be able to gather in ways that are not depleting, that are not demoralizing, that don’t make people’s ass hurts. Because we truly believe that solidarity is an important concept, especially in this day and time.

JASON WYMAN:

Facilitation for the Future starts now, not in the future, with finding ways for us to gather that cultivate futures we where We All are cultivating Power-With. In order for us to do that, we need to find, sustain, connect, and grow tactics, strategies, activities, practice and praxis that shift us towards Power-With in the here and now. We need Power-With to become more powerful than Power-Over, which is currently the system of capitalism, oppression, white supremacy, cisheteropatriarchy.

CRYSTAL MASON:

We need to feel like we have the tools that will take us into the future we see and want and dream about. That’s what Facilitation for the Future is about. One of the reasons we came up with this is because we’ve been in different meetings and and finding that the subject matter and what people wanted to do was right on, but that the facilitation left me feeling like I don’t know if I want to return.

We need a lot of people to be able to lead and to feel like they ARE leaders. We need people who have the skills to to guide people in meetings and gatherings in as many ways as possible. At the end of the day, facilitation is a bridge.

JASON WYMAN:

Facilitation for the Future is a radical, visionary praxis space aimed at generating Power-With in the face of our failing institutions and structures that too often are not working for Us All. Our workshop offers practical tips for relating, organizing, and leading that emphasizes collective agency, shared decision-making, and co-creation, rather than domination or control. It focuses on building relationships, collaboration, and mutual support, where everyone is seen as both a teacher and a learner. Power-With values each person’s lived experience and expertise, and seeks to gather Us All so We All can act together, feel ownership, and invest in autonomous collective actions.​

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Hi. I am Jason Wyman / Queerly Complex. I am one of four Co-Founders of Culture Tending Commons, which includes Crystal Mason, Vanessa Rodriguez Minero, and Wendy Martinez Morroquin. We co-create tools, tactics, activities, and ways of gathering that grow Power-With.

One of those ways of gathering is called Peer Exchanges. Peer Exchanges gather affinity groups to explore topics, share ideas and resources, and connect with one another around topics crucial to that affinity group. Within the Peer Exchange, everyone is a comrade, and we have developed guides and flows to time and space that are grounded in solidarity, camaraderie, and equity.

In January 2025, I took our Peer Exchange Toolkit to Fivestar of Filthy Studios. Fivestar is a close friend, client, and comrade. In our conversations post election, Fivestar saw a need to gather her community in response to Project 2025. Together, we launched the first Sex Worker / Erotic Professional / Adult Industry Worker Peer Exchange.

What follows is the result of ten months of gatherings. Some were more open / a bit wider and invited more into circle to share around a specific topic. Some were a bit smaller as a way to craft, modify, and adapt to the specific needs, wants, and desires of sex workers, erotic professionals, and adult industry workers.

What’s resulting from our gathering as peers is a deeply committed core producing Sex Worker / Erotic Professionals / Adult Industry Workers Peer Exchanges, a wider circle contributing ideas, knowledge, skills, and resources, and a model others can use, adapt, or modify to also gather as peers.

I am incredibly proud of the what we are collectively creating through Culture Tending Commons and the Sex Worker / Erotic Professionals / Adult Industry Workers Peer Exchanges. We are demonstrating through practice that Power-With is possible here and now, which means it has always been here and will always be here.

And that is truly a power We All could use right about now.

What follows is what we—Fivestar, Polly Bombshell, and Amanda “Dusty” Wallace of Filthy Studios, Savannah Sly and Sasha Bee of EPA United and New Moon Fund, Ian O’Brien of PASS Certified, and I co-created over these last 10 months. It includes:

• Who We Are & Where We Stand

• How Do We Gather & What Do We Believe

• An Agenda to Explore Addressing, Managing, Transforming Conflict

• Notes from Our Peer Exchange by

Looking to deepen or brush up on your facilitation skills? Join Jason Wyman and Crystal Mason (with Culture Tending Commons) on Saturday, December 6, 2025, via Zoom for Facilitation for the Future.

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Who We Are & Where We Stand

We are a collective of sex workers, erotic professionals, adult industry workers, allies, and advocates united to foster a society that values and respects our labor, our rights, and our humanity. Our goal is to dismantle stigma, combat discrimination, and eliminate systemic barriers in society. Our work is self directed while budding from our shared ideals; we call this autonomous collective action.

Through open dialogue, intersectional organizing, and mutual aid, we aim to:

• Advocate for fair treatment, safe working conditions, and access to basic resources such as banking, housing, and healthcare.

• Mobilize our collective power to combat the inequities perpetuated by hostile entities, discriminatory policies, and social misconceptions.

• Build a cohesive and resilient community that transcends silos and fosters collaboration across all facets of our industries.

• Amplify our voices in the media and public discourse to challenge stereotypes and promote accurate, humanizing narratives.

Ours is a future where sex, erotic, and adult industry work is recognized as valid labor, where our contributions are celebrated, and where we are empowered to thrive with dignity, safety, and autonomy. We believe in the transformative power of connection, education, and shared action to achieve a just society.

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How Do We Gather & What Do We Believe

1. We intentionally gather small groups of peers together in mutual aid, care, and exchange to ensure all can participate / contribute and be heard, seen, and witnessed.

2. We center the needs of those most at risk by:

   • Reaching out to, including, and prioritizing those with lived experiences in the topics/spaces we are discussing/organizing around

   • Learning about the systems of racism, cisheteropatriachy, ableism, and ageism that negatively affect many sex workers, erotic professionals, and adult industry workers so that we can challenge them and not replicate them in our own communities and organizing.

   • Recognizing that what harms our colleagues harms all of us.

3. We strive to use technology (e.g. video conferencing, document creation & sharing, social media, messaging, AI, etc.) thoughtfully, with special consideration towards:

   • Anonymity and confidentiality

   • How data is stored and used

   • Commercial interests

   • Accessibility

4. We articulate goals, outcomes, roles, and agreements for Peer Exchanges by:

   • Providing clear communication of who’s doing what, when, and where

   • Using calendars or role charts to coordinate effectively and avoid burnout or duplication

   • Providing clear marching orders, next steps, or follow up

   • Setting meeting times for ease of understanding how / when to participate

5. We practice grace and patience for each other and ourselves by:

   • Assuming good intentions while staying open to feedback about your impact

   • Recognizing that we come from different backgrounds and experiences

   • Acknowledging that everyone makes mistakes.

   • Avoiding exclusion or shunning.

   • Rejecting punishment-based (anti-carceral) approaches

   • Committing to resolving issues directly with each other rather than through institutions

   • Co-creating an informed, collaborative process for addressing and transforming conflict

6. We make it accessible for people to get involved in Peer Exchanges by:

   • Honoring contributions at all levels, durations, and frequencies

   • Providing transparent and varied communication channels that meet people where they are (e.g. email, Signal thread, texting, etc.)

   • Designating an easy to access platform for updates, next steps, and decisions, ensuring they are documented so no one is left out / behind.

7. We acknowledge own boundaries and capacities and commit to not overcommitting

8. We practice discretion by:

   • Not sharing who is involved in this group so you do not accidentally out them

   • Being explicit about what information is just for the group and what can be shared out

9. We do not collaborate, convene, or communicate with law enforcement.

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An Agenda to Explore Addressing, Managing, Transforming Conflict

Main Question

What tactics, tools, practices, and theories do we have or do we draw from to address, manage, and ultimately transform conflict within our sex workers, erotic professionals, and adult industry workers communities?

Goal

To gather up to 20 sex workers, erotic professionals, and adult industry workers to share strategies, tools, practices, and theories that can aid our intersecting communities in addressing, managing, and transforming conflict as a means to disrupt cycles of punishment, shame, exclusion, and abandonment.

Outcomes

• A focused conversation between 12-20 sex workers, erotic professionals, and adult industry workers

• An agenda informed by sex workers, erotic professionals, adult industry workers, advocates, and allies that can be easily replicated by others to facilitate conversation about addressing, managing, and transforming conflict

• A list of strategies, tools, practices, and theories with citations that will be published and shared with the broader sex workers, erotic professionals, and adult industry workers communities

• A step along the path of our Visionary Solidarity Statement

Links

• Slideshow

• Resources Survey

Agenda

0:00 Casual Arrival

• Play music and greet people as they arrive.

• Invite people to share their name, pronoun, and where they are calling from in chat.

0:05 Grounding Breath

• Invite people to connect with their body and being through breath.

0:10 Visionary Solidarity Statement, Guiding Principles, Agenda Review, Introductions

• Share link to agenda in chat.

• Read Visionary Solidarity Statement aloud.

• Read Guiding Principles 1, 5, 8, 9 aloud.

• Review Main Question, Goals & Outcomes on Agenda aloud.

• Ask for any clarifying questions, feedback, or comments.

• Check for understanding and consensus.

• Invite people to introduce themselves

0:20 Three Case Studies on Conflict

• Premise / History - SAVANNAH

  • In response to escalating political, economic, and social attacks against sex workers, erotic professionals, and adult industry workers, we (Fivestar of Filthy Studios, Ian O’Brien of PASS, and Jason Wyman / Queerly Complex) have gathered sex workers, erotic professionals, adult industry workers, advocates, and allies over Three Peer Exchanges to share ideas, resources, and tactics on topics crucial to our intersecting communities.

  • This has led to a Visionary Solidarity Statement, Guiding Principles, and the formation of a small Planning Team, including Fivestar, Polly Bombshell, and Dusty from Filthy Studios, Savannah Sly and Sasha Bee from EPA United and New Moon Fund, Ian O’Brien from PASS Certified, and Jason Wyman / Queerly Complex.

  • Over the Summer and Autumn of 2025, the Planning Team identified TWO crucial conversations / inquiries which keep coming up within the sex worker, erotic professional, and adult industry communities: Addressing, Managing, and Transforming Conflict AND Structures for Raising Funds from Fans (towards mutual aid and advocacy).

  • Together, the Planning Team adapted the Spring 2025 Peer Exchange model to include a refined Visionary Solidarity Statement, more precise Guiding Principles, additional forms for facilitating crucial conversations, and a broader, more diverse outreach list to engage in the conversations to generate shareable strategies, tools, practices, and theories.

  • For this conversation, our Planning Team pulled THREE CASE STUDIES based on personal and collective experiences that demonstrate aspects of conflict that frequently occur.

  • The FIRST CASE STUDY looks at Interpersonal Conflict between individuals or personal beefs that can lead to bigger conflicts when left unresolved or not addressed.

  • The SECOND CASE STUDY looks at Organizational Conflict or what happens when someone undermines movement organizing.

  • The THIRD CASE STUDY looks at Sexual Assault and the ripples of harm that generate conflict among individuals, groups, organizations, and businesses.

  • Each Case Study is timed and has a short overview and some initial guiding questions. Peers will be invited to first think about their responses for 2 minutes. Then, we will open conversation among the group. Notes will be taken during the conversation.

  • Check for understanding.

• The Case Studies

  • 15 min - FIRST - Interpersonal Conflict - DUSTY

    • Situation: We’re all at an industry event. Some people start talking about collabing, and others feel left out. Someone voices feeling excluded and/or unsupported.

    • Discussion Focus: How do we balance group inclusion with business goals? What steps can we take to avoid shunning?

  • 25 min - SECOND - Organizational Conflict - IAN

    • Situation: An individual begins to take unilateral actions at odds with the collective’s principles. For example:

      • They give interviews to the media, presenting strategies and demands that the group hasn’t agreed on.

      • OR…They start separate meetings with the broader community, positioning themself as the group’s “leader.”

      • OR…They involve law enforcement in their local activities.

      • OR…When confronted, they proclaim they are being ‘unfairly targeted’ and threaten to publicly undermine the group on social media

    • Discussion Focus: What accountability structures could prevent or address unilateral actions without creating a culture of policing or mistrust? How might we communicate transparently with the broader community so misinformation doesn’t spread?

  • 30 min - THIRD - Sexual Assault - FIVESTAR

    • Situation: A performer posts on social media about experiencing assault on set with another performer. The accused performer maintains innocence, and the community is divided about how to interact with both performers.

    • Discussion Focus: How do we chart a course towards truth, understanding, and repair while also having to navigate legal considerations, public perception, capacity, and know-how? What practices, strategies, policies, and resources are already available to cultivate safety for sex workers, erotic professionals, and adult industry workers, specifically around sexual assault? What is the role of a group in accusations of harm?

1:30 Summary of Conversation

• Share survey to collect resources.

• Jason (or someone else) summarizes the conversation thus far, including strategies, tools, practices, and theories shared.

• Ask for any citations to be shared via CHAT so we can gather links.

1:45 Checking for Actions

• See if there are any follow up / action items or next steps.

• Ask WHO is going to do them for every item.

1:50 What’s Next from Peer Exchanges?

• Does anyone want to join the Planning Group?

• We will be compiling everything from this Peer Exchange into a PUBLIC POST via www.culturetending.com.

• We will be convening Peers across even more sectors in early 2026 to discuss tactics for building Power With.

2:55 Closing Breath

• Reconnect with body and being through breath.

• Invite folks to leave with a bit more ease, a bit more connected, and a bit more resourced

3:00 Casual Departure

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Notes from Peer Exchange, taken and compiled by Monique Starr

In Attendance

• Fivestar

• Polly Bombshell

• Amanda “Dusty” Wallace

• Savannah Sly

• Ian O’Brien

• Jason Wyman

• Monique Starr

• Sinn Sage

• Soleil Merroir

• Plus 3 Others

Case Study 1 (Interpersonal Conflict)- Read by Dusty

• Having solidified group agreements, enforcing and setting clear boundaries around discrimination and exclusion, and holding people accountable for whorephobic, whorearchical, and oppressive comments is important for mitigating interpersonal conflict.

• Being intentional with hiring consultants, planners, and trusted organizers who are aligned with the leadership team and goals and also can represent the most marginalized identities is helpful with building trust between leadership and attendees while simultaneously ensuring that people are feeling seen, heard, valued, and supported.

• Give people a task/ice breakers/ guiding questions to lead the conversation and push people to talk to others in the group for a common goal.

• Have a co-content creation opportunity (i.e. a photobooth, photographer,etc) to get people to naturally include themselves.

• A question was asked about how we can approach situations where organizers don’t care about being inclusive or cause drama, and the general consensus was that we may have to refuse entry or refuse collaboration with people, groups, or entities that are unwilling to work cohesively and collaboratively.

Case Study 2 (Organizational Conflict)- Read by Ian

• PR crisis management and communications training, consultants, or even org team members can communicate with the org on how to navigate and deescalate digital harm and conflict.

• Calling people in and having probationary periods for when people go against grounding principles prior to escalating to removals helps.

• Keeping things relational and maintaining/growing bonds within the group is helpful for how we learn how to approach people in conflict. We have to know and trust people to have better outcomes for conflict resolution.

• Speaking to one another from a human perspective (outside of the work) to have conversations and build connections before conflict happens is helpful as well.

• Assume good intentions, leading with curiosity– not accusation.

• Having a game plan for worst-case-scenario situations and being calm, organized, and on a united front is crucial.

• Reviewing community goals and also being mindful of adding principles that ensure higher levels of safety (i.e. not working with inviting law enforcement) .

• Make sure that intersectional organizing is led by organizers!

• Knowing people’s strengths and weaknesses and communicating them to the group is really important.

• Some people are not meant to do group work.

• Be patient.

• Have a plan in place for community members that are diligent but also difficult to work with.

Case Study 3 ( TW: SA and Harm)- Read by Fivestar

• We need more on set advocates, intimacy coordinators, sex educators to help support performers and workers.

• We have to mitigate the potential for assault and abuse by:

  • Event staff, security, etc. being about barring entry for and removing people who are permanently banned from spaces and not allow them to attend and potentially cause further harm.

  • Being mindful that workers may be coming into sex work experiencing and dealing with their own sexual traumas, and the industry should start creating trainings to help support survivors who are also sex workers.

  • Support survivors and treat their experience seriously.

  • Allow survivors to define their own meaning and needs around restorative justice.

• We need multiple policies and collaborations to promote cultural shifts and changes to promote safer practices in performer spaces.

• Clip sites, cam sites, etc. need to have more workshops, blog posts, and training for performers to maintain safety.

• Platforms need to take on the task to fund training and workshops and also hold workers accountable for not doing their due diligence to have safe work practices.

• We have to rely on ourselves and other community members to make more content to support one another.

• Reshare content and resources for orgs such as PASS.

Summary (Thematic Threads)

• We need more intercommunal connection, relationship building and conversation is crucial in order to keep the work going.

  • We have to work together to curate resources for fellow sex workers.

• Intersectionality matters, and we need to hold how we approach this work with the
  same importance as the work being done.

• We are rich in resources, including our own curiosity, that teach us to adapt and respond rather than react.

Additional Resources

• Healing Accountability Wheel

• Culture Tending Commons- international group that guides peer exchanges for different forms of workers of various identities. The notes will be published on the site.

Bios of Planning Team

Fivestar

Fivestar, the owner of Filthy Studios, is an experienced and respected adult film director and producer, bondage rigger, and free speech advocate located in the San Francisco Bay Area. She is passionate about increasing the diversity of representation within the adult industry both in front of and behind the camera. She produces films that affirm and celebrate a wide variety of kinky desires, which requires care and attention at all stages of production.

Polly Bombshell

Polly Bombshell is a Latinx dominatrix, Daddy, Mistress, and sex worker rights advocate based in San Francisco. Polly was raised in the SF leather community and has a combined 18 years of experience as an educator and high-fetish Domina. She is a heavy player with a penchant for D/s and sadism, who loves to teach new sex workers and performers how to navigate both on their own. When she isn’t traveling, bartending, or hustling, Polly is a fixture at Filthy Studios and various gay leather events in San Francisco. She loves helping Fivestar and the Filthy team to destroy the barriers of censorship, ableism, fatphobia, and discrimination in the adult industry.

Amanda “Dusty” Wallace

Amanda “Dusty” Wallace (she/her) is a queer Latina from Oakland, California, dedicated to building inclusive, community-driven spaces. Beginning her career in the adult industry in 2012, she advanced to become Head of Community & Education at Kink.com, where she developed programs that fostered connection, learning, and empowerment.

With a background spanning events, social media, and brand strategy, Dusty specializes in creating environments that celebrate authenticity and spark meaningful engagement. She is deeply committed to advocacy for sex worker rights, LGBTQIA+ and BIPOC liberation, and animal welfare.

She currently works with Filthy Studios.

Savannah Sly

Speaking from lived and studied experience, Sly articulates the impacts of criminalization, surveillance, discrimination and stigma on sex workers and survivors of exploitation to lawmakers, the media, and general public.

Sly is the founder and co-director of New Moon Network, an intermediary fund that successfully channeled over $1,500,000 into sex worker-led organizations between 2022-2024. Recognizing the need for mentorship in the movement for sex workers rights, Sly launched Spokes Hub in collaboration with Woodhull Freedom Foundation to offer free online peer learning opportunities for advocates with lived experience in the sex trade.

As board president of SWOP USA, Sly successfully coordinated 40+ sex workers from across the US to appear on the cover of New York Times Magazine. An organizer at heart, Sly has played a powerful convening role for the ALCU-WA’s Tech Equity Coalition, and the #OldProProject.

More at www.savannahsly.com.

Sasha Bee

Sasha works at EPA United and New Moon Network.

Ian O’Brien

Ian O’Brien is the Executive Director of PASS Certified. With over 15 years of experience in the sexual and reproductive health and rights field; Ian has worked on issues of asylum, abortion access, sexuality and gender-based violence, and sex work. Ian studied Sociomedical Sciences and History, Ethics, and Law at Columbia University’s Mailman School of Public Health, and holds BA in Multicultural Queer Studies from Humboldt State University.

Jason Wyman / Queerly Complex

Jason Wyman / Queerly Complex, was born upon the Land of 10,000 Lakes on what they are coming to know as Turtle Island, who has settled on Yelamu, which is also called San Francisco. Jason’s name means healer, or so they have been told since a young child, and they did not believe it until their father, Michael (Mike) James Wyman, and Jason mended their selves and one another as Mike died of mantle cell non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma across a screen and a country over all of 2020. What Jason has come to understand as the significance of their name is that healer does not mean healed or (even) healing. Rather, it is a positionality within the cosmos that allows one’s self to change & be changed by all that unfolds.

Wyman is also one half of Tree of Change, a consultant with AllThrive Education, a co-founder of Culture Tending Commons, a team member of Filthy Studios, and a creator of Chaos Poetry. They practice the art of relating to one’s self, each other, and the Cosmic Mysteries.

I find in groups and organizations made up of people who have been marginalized by oppressive systems, folks are often afraid to seem or to be too powerful. Maybe it’s because we often experience power over instead of with. It’s like sitting in a room full of super heroes, who insist on wearing their street clothes.

From the moment I stood up to a frustrated teacher in fourth grade—organizing my classmates into the hallway to sing and dance to the Ike & Tina Turner version of Proud Mary, until he couldn’t help but laugh and apologize—I learned something that has shaped my life ever since: power doesn’t have to be about domination; it can be about connection. When we build power with instead of over, something transformative happens.

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My journey through activism—from the urgency of ACT UP in the early ’90s to the careful, everyday work of a low income housing co-op—has been a study in this principle. Again and again, I’ve seen how marginalized people, even when hemmed in by systems of domination, can reclaim power by choosing to wield it in collaboration rather than competition.

In ACT UP, I learned that solidarity isn’t a warm, fuzzy feeling. It’s not a chant around a campfire or a photo-op. It’s the day-in, day-out labor of being in relationship across difference. It’s showing up for each other, even when it’s inconvenient. When ACT UP meetings prioritized the voices of white, gay men whose needs felt most urgent, it was those of us on the margins—Black and Brown folks, women, trans people, drug users—who reminded the room that the AIDS crisis was never just one crisis. Our survival demanded a broader, deeper, more inclusive fight. We weren’t just advocating for medication access—we were demanding recognition of everyone’s full humanity.

That’s the first hard truth about power-with: you don’t have to be in charge to be powerful.

But here’s the second, even harder one: If we build power on the backs of those already most oppressed, it’s not solidarity—it’s a reenactment of harm.

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Too often in movements, urgency becomes an excuse to replicate hierarchy. We default to the loudest voice, the most charismatic speaker, the person with institutional backing. And if we’re not vigilant, we recreate the very systems we claim to oppose. White supremacy, cisnormativity, ableism, anti-Blackness—they all sneak in through the back door when we mistake efficiency for justice.

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That’s why I believe in deliberate ways of practicing power-with. Here are a few of the strategies I use:

• Self Reflection - to challenge my own bias and to be accountable about how I use my power.
  
  

• Ensure everyone speaks – not just the most confident or seasoned organizers.
  
  

• Prioritize people over process – because care is more important than control.
  
  

• Practice transparency – so decisions aren’t made in back rooms.
  
  

• Embrace principled disagreement – because conflict can be generative, in fact conflict is necessary for growth.

These practices aren’t fancy pants. They’re not always fast. But they can be revolutionary.

And when we get them right—when we really share power, not just pretend to—we unlock something more potent than any policy change. We become the kind of people who can hold each other through the storms, and there will always be storms. Who can say, “I’ve got you,” and mean it. Who can build movements not just for liberation, but liberation built on love and care.

Power with is slow. It’s awkward. It’s full of growing pains. But it can also be magic.

We are not powerless. We are superheroes in street clothes—learning every day how to lift each other up, without pushing anyone down.

We just need to remember to put on our capes.

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Even amidst ever escalating fear, punishment, tyranny, and oppression a truth remains: Us-All hold the key to collective freedom and liberation. And what we witness in spaces we culturally tend is that for those on the frontlines—emergency responders, organizers, cultural workers, artists, and sex workers—this embodied knowing isn't just personal practice; it's the foundation of revolution.

Wisdom Lives Within Us-All

Imagine a world where We-All are not disconnected, but deeply attuned to the cellular wisdom within. Where each boundary We-All set, each connection forged, springs from the authentic ground of embodied presence. This is not utopian thinking—it's the revolution already happening in spaces where movement workers dare to feel.

When we honor our body's signals and create necessary boundaries in our personal relationships, we are not just practicing self-care. We are embodying the revolutionary principle that transformation begins with listening to the wisdom our bodies already possess. In each moment we honor these signals, we create microcosms of the world we're fighting to build—one where autonomy and interconnection dance in harmony.

For us, this looks like taking the time needed and necessary for us to arrive at collective understanding / meaning making. We do not rush to produce. We pause and dream when needed / desired. We give space-time to witness each of our own selves and one another. We move at the speed of collectivity, so that what we co-create contains the DNA of Us-All’s liberation from systems designed to harm, punish, dominate, and oppress.

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Break the Trance of Disconnection

Dominating systems survive by fostering disconnection—from ourselves, from each other, from the earth sustaining Us-All. These systems fragment Us-All into smaller and smaller compartments reinforcing distrust of the very bodies carrying Cosmic Knowing. They erect borders between Us-All sowing paranoia and fear of one another to suppress Collective Wisdom. It is a cycle meant to overwhelm sense / senses, forcing Us-All into a deep trance that seems impossible to break.

We embed somatic practice into all aspects of our meeting and workshop agenda preparation and facilitation. In the spaces we tend (virtually and in person), we witness breakthrough moments when people reconnect with embodied truth. One example comes from a workshop Crystal facilitated on microaggressions for SEIU. After facilitating a somatic exercise, Crystal observed participants recognizing past harms. Their bodies clearly remembered what their minds had been forced to forget. Tears flowed, hearts opened, and the artificial walls between intellectual understanding and lived experience dissolved. It moved the entire group, and Crystal too.

This is one of the powers of somatics: Remembrance in the body. In becoming aware or more in tune with our own physicality, we (re)connect not just with our corporeality, we (re)connect to our spirit, our memories, our generational (blood and chosen) roots. We become aware of Us-All, which aids us in breaking the trance of disconnection.

Respite Is Power

What becomes possible when We-All locate power not in individual / individuated systems, but in Collective Embodied Wisdom? Every time We-All ground through breath and movement, We-All resist the system forcing Us-All to shrink. Each time We-All acknowledge contradictions within each body, We-All build capacity to navigate the contradictions in movements and communities. When We-All honor boundaries and recognize where energy leaks, We-All create sustainable practices that will outlast the systems We-All are abolishing.

This is not abstract theory. At AllThrive Education, Wendy Martinez-Marroquin and Vanessa Rodriguez Minero facilitated weekly Collective Care Sessions for COVID first responders from 2022 to 2024 for The Center at Sierra Health Foundation. Due to regular, long-term commitment by the funder, the grantees knew there was consistent space to (re)connect with their bodies. This offering became a lifeline to the workers running into the (proverbial) fire because it facilitated a pause. In this space of breath, participants (re)discovered their power, both within themselves and within the collective (virtual) body of the Zoom room.

Collective Care Sessions remind us that respite is power. And We-All need to remember this now more than ever.

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Tending to Culture Reveals The Collective Body

As We-All stand at a pivotal moment of systemic collapse, The Collective Body offers not just resistance but renaissance. We-All hold the blueprint for the world being (re)created / (re)made / (re)born—one where autonomous actions become collective liberation. Thus, tending space-time (aka culture) in ways that are rooted in the interdependence of Us-All aid Us-All in attuning each body / every be-ing towards The Collective Body.

At the Culture Tending Commons, we're witnessing this vision unfold. Our work with our clients and communities center (some of) those most impacted by systemic oppression (e.g. emergency responders, Black artists and creatives, sex workers, and queer and trans communities). It is crucial that we examine our own observations, biases, labor, and energies, so we do not perpetuate cycles of harm, exploitation, or exhaustion.

Our praxis of culture tending disrupts these patterns. We pause, dream, and be. Over and again. Thus, curiosity replaces expectations, responsiveness supersedes dominant modes / models, and interdependence outshines isolated efforts.

And The Collective Body becomes revealed to Us-All.

Feel Courageously: An Invitation into Revolutionary Presence

Make no mistake—this path requires Us-All to deeply and courageously feel. In a Man-made world designed to numb, BE-ing is a revolutionary act. Being, though, stirs deep feelings, often ones that surface discomfort, discontent, depression, and dissociation. To be able to sit fully with all these emotions and to resist instant resolution or gratification and to face the contradictions within and amongst Us-All demands Us-All to be brave.

For those on the frontlines of transformation, courage isn't optional. It's the foundation of sustainable resistance. It's how We-All remain whole in fragmenting times, (re)connect amidst forces of separation, and harness The Collective Body.

Our bodies are not just vessels carrying us through struggle—they are wisdom keepers, resistance fighters, dream weavers of the world to come. They hold memories of ancestral resilience and visions of futures yet to be born.

We-All are invited into Revolutionary Presence.

Let me / us / Us-All move through the world fully present—pausing, dreaming, being.

Let me / us / Us-All create practices honoring individual needs / wants / desires and The Collective Body.

Let me / us / Us-All tend to cultures in ways where vulnerability becomes strength, where rest becomes resistance, where feeling becomes freedom.

In a world designed to make us small:

We choose expansion. We choose sensation. We choose connection. We choose liberation as present practice (not some future goal.)

We-All are not just dreaming of a new world—We-All are becoming it, breath by breath, movement by movement, heart by collective heart.

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The Culture Tending Commons welcomes all who seek to integrate embodied practices into their movement work. Join us in growing something beautiful together—a culture of resistance rooted in the revolutionary wisdom of our bodies.

We are living with a great contradiction: The growing need to trust one another amidst a deepening culture of hate and mistrust of anyone labeled “other.” Everywhere we turn there are dominant narratives of who we should fear, who is a criminal, and who is deserving of punishment by the state. It is fueled by a system (mainstream media, corporations, and government) that does not and cannot care by design. All is meant to burn us out, keeping us disconnected from that which can aid us most: mutual care, understanding, and support.

At AllThrive Education, we practice being love in action both with our clients and amongst our team as an antidote to the systemic burnout fueling our disconnection and deepening our distrust. This includes regular check-ins as a team about how we understand, make meaning of, and practice core concepts of our mission, “We all thrive being love in action.”

These check-ins, or as we call them “portals”, bring us deeper into relation with one another, so that we can unflatten our individual perspectives and start cultivating mutual understanding. We do this all with space, grace, and care.

On Friday, February 21, 2025, we–Wendy Martinez Morroquin, Vanessa Rodriguez Minero, and Jason Wyman / Queerly Complex–gathered on Zoom. Initially, it was supposed to be a working meeting about our Culture Tending Commons / Collective. But as we checked in, we realized there was something more pressing for us to discuss. We turned our “meeting” into a “portal” and dove into a core question each of us is facing: How do we tend to trust in times of deepening distrust?

We took space-time to be with our own thoughts, letting silence fill our virtual “room.” We spoke only when finally moved to do so. Each gave a deeply considered, thoughtful responses, ones that expanded personal insight. By the end of our “portal,” we were grateful our transcription software captured our conversation because we realized we generated collective wisdom, which acts as a reminder for our team (individually and collectively) and (maybe) can be a beacon for others searching for some guides on trust building.

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Six Guides on How to Tend to Trust

1. Use “mirror work” to cultivate trust in one’s own being.

“What's helping me trust myself is lots of mirror work. I literally stand there and face myself, you know. Just to see myself like, ‘Wow, you've overcome a lot of things; you're wise,’” shared Wendy.

Mirror work, whether actually in front of a mirror or imagining your being in your mind’s eye, makes you look more closely at your reflection. This deep witnessing can help you embody trust. When trust becomes embodied, you have the possibility to become more vulnerable with the people you care about. Shared vulnerability between friends, allies, accomplices, neighbors, or comrades has the opportunity to strengthen or deep trust. This is especially true when your shared vulnerability helps ease stress, overwhelm, or burnout mutually.

For Wendy, she’s witnessed the transformative power of mirror work and shared vulnerability through AllThrive Education. She is facing challenges and asking for support. Most importantly, she is showing up for herself, her family, and her neighbors and comrades.

2. Replace rigidity with curiosity; develop an inquisitive mindset.

“Over the last five years, I didn't set the expectations of traveling abroad, but I was curious. And when the opportunities came to me, my curiosity is what made travelling abroad possible,” Vanessa shared.

Learning how to keep one’s mind open and flexible helps make what seems impossible possible. One’s thoughts create pathways, patterns, and crevices that make navigating the world more familiar, which can breed a certain amount of comfort even with things that do not serve us. An inquisitive mindset facilitates questioning those pathways, patterns, and crevices so they do not become trenches from which we cannot climb out. Remaining curious to the outside world, one’s own interiority, and the dynamism between the two is a way to become unstuck, climb to varying heights, and experience the totality of the cosmos in new ways.

For Vanessa, holding a desire to travel abroad while releasing expectations of how it was going to happen inspired curiosity. Her openness invited possibilities, which ultimately led her to trips to Mexico and South Africa. This is creating a feedback loop that is both disrupting bias and encouraging her to trust in even larger, bolder, more liberatory dreams.

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3. Forget your own definition of words; listen for how others use and practice their words.

“I'm finding it hard to trust the meaning of words, and whether or not we all have the same understanding of what words mean. There's so much that is so misunderstood because everyone's sold something different from their own reality,” shared Jason.

Everyone has a different reality from which they experience and make meaning of the world. It is formed by many factors that are personal, social, systemic, generational, and cosmic. One’s unique positionality creates a multiplicity of understandings of words, ideas, and concepts. To cultivate plurality (or an awareness of the multiplicity of understandings), it can be helpful to let go of one’s own definitions and understanding, so you can become more aware and attuned to the way others express their words.

For Jason, learning how to forget their own definitions is a lifelong pursuit. They sometimes still get tripped up when there is a large gap in understanding between people. One thing that has aided them is taking a pause to observe where they are and where others’ understanding lies. This helps them reorient themselves, which makes it easier to trust in plurality.

4. Engage in vulnerable, reflective conversations with your communities.

“I couldn’t have arrived at the wisdom that we arrived at today on my own or in any other format that didn't feel constructive and authentic. It feels really important to have access to this kind of vulnerable, reflective community space,” shared Wendy.

It can be risky to reveal the richness of your being to others and invite introspective conversation into the things we do not understand, fear, are passionate about, desire, or celebrate. Taking this risk, though, is a way to strengthen, deepen, and widen who witnesses us and who we witness. Witnessing is a step on the pathway towards trusting one another, developing mutual understanding, articulating collective wisdom, and practicing love in action.

For Wendy, AllThrive Education is a community with whom she can be vulnerable. AllThrive’s “Portals” invite her to more deeply share her beliefs, ways of being, and biases with the team. This exchange deepens trust between team members, which makes trusting others a bit easier.

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5. Let go of control; embrace autonomous collective actions.

“Trust the culture that you've actually tended. Like, let go of it all. It's a collective effort, and you actually need to see yourself as part of the collective,” shared Jason.

One way to tend to trust building between a group / groups is by acknowledging and affirming everyone’s autonomy, or each person’s ability to make decisions and take accountability for their decision. When trying to move towards a collective destination, letting go of the exact way you get there opens up opportunities for more people to decide to take personal actions towards it. Facilitating autonomous collective actions is especially critical now as the landscape around us constantly shifts, making large-scale, coordinated action more difficult.

For Jason, gathering as peers is (and has been) the mechanism by which autonomous collective actions most naturally spring. When everyone gathered contributes towards mutual understanding, it inspires peers to articulate possible actions that can instigate movement. And Jason trusts those actions will be taken when they need to be taken by those that need to take them. Jason has experienced this phenomenon time and again, especially with their work with AllThrive Education.

6. Reflect upon unresolved conflicts, and how you desire to face future conflicts (even if you are unsure you will face them the way you desire.)

“I didn't successfully face a past conflict with care for myself and the other person, and I've been having trouble trusting that if this were to happen again, will I really be vulnerable enough to admit my vulnerability to the person I'm in conflict with,” shared Vanessa.

Contradictions arise when there is more than one perspective present. How you face contradictions mediates whether or not that contradiction becomes a conflict. Reflecting upon past contradictions that became conflicts, especially unresolved ones, can help you discover your biases, shadows, and boundaries. Once named, you can better articulate how you want to mediate contradictions before they become conflicts.

For Vanessa, an unresolved conflict with a once close friend, who is a fellow undocuorganizer, resurfaced when she saw their name recently. It reminded her that she failed someone. Vanessa has proof from other relations, including Wendy at AllThrive Education, that she has grown. And it is her doubt that reminds her she can trust herself to be courageous when facing future contradictions and conflicts.

Queer Artist Survival Salons are the co-creation of Beth Stephens / EARTH Lab SF and Jason Wyman / Queerly Complex based upon the Culture Tending Collective’s Peer Exchange Model. They are one in a series of Peer Exchanges being hosted / facilitated by Culture Tending Collective members.

This post was cross published on www.queerlycomplex.com.

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Cold winds & large raindrops on a Thursday in February creating
Possible deterrents for gathering
Queer Artists in circle sharing
Our beings so tenderly with one another revealing
Recipes for care, hope, joy aidingUs in our Collective Queer Survival.

Still, we did gather 20 in circle talking
Story about sunshine moments & cuddle piles & mini resetting
Reboots & sex positivity & dismantling
Fascism & underground hot springs & love being
How we as Queer Artists creating
Create the worlds we & our forebears & our descendants desire Here & Now.

Over garlicky noodles several weeks later we gather
Once more to reflectUpon that which made
Our Queer Artists Survival Salon feel
Safe enough & brave enough & light enough & vulnerable enough for Us-All to be
Fully our whole, glorious Queer Beings, a revelation:
To be witnessed, to be reflected, to be affirmed is care & hope & joy.

May these poetics be a recipe that alongside all recipes crafted by Queer Artists on a cold and rainy 13 February 2025 at 465 Collective, a space residing upon Yelamu, aid Us-All in reflecting, witnessing, and affirming the fullness of Our Being Here & Now & Always & In All Ways.

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The Recipes Collected

About Queer Artist Survival Salons

EARTH Lab SF (Beth Stephens) and Jason Wyman / Queerly Complex are hosting THREE Peer Exchanges at the new 465 Collective Space to harness the peer power of San Francisco Bay Area Queer Artists to co-create survival tactics, tools, and frameworks.

We, as queer / dyke / fag artists, know that our art / work / collections have been, continue to be, and will likely always be censored by domination, oppression, and tyranny. We will think, dream, and work together to develop tactics that ensure our being / art / work survives these attacks. Each Peer Exchange in this series focuses on a different aspect of queer / dyke / fag survival and uses arts-based activities to generate collective wisdom. We will gather our results into an online resource guide with the participants' consent. This guide will feature a summary of the Peer Exchanges, art activities to aid personal and collective exploration, and suggested material and actions for deeper understanding and analysis. We will autonomously and collectively take action to ensure queer / dyke / fag art / artists are more interconnected, documented, and their work shared, so that it / we survive long into the future.

“There must be those among whom we can sit down and weep and still be counted as warriors.” ― Adrienne Rich

When we talk about brave spaces, we’re talking about environments where people feel safe enough to be honest, take risks, and engage in meaningful conversations—especially about difficult topics. We are talking about spaces that let us be warriors and be sad and tired. Spaces that let us be champions of change and scared and uncertain. But for a space to truly be brave, it requires something that can feel uncomfortable: vulnerability.

Vulnerability is often misunderstood as weakness, or lacking professional distance but in reality, it’s the foundation of the trust and connection necessary to have honest conversations. When leaders, facilitators, and participants show vulnerability, they set the tone for everyone to be themselves, have their feelings and to come to the work as whole, complicated human beings.

Why Does Vulnerability Matter?

1. It Builds Trust
   When someone is willing to share their struggles, mistakes, or uncertainties, it signals to others that they can do the same. Trust grows when people feel they don’t have to be perfect to be accepted.

2. It Encourages Honesty
   People are more likely to speak their truths when they see others doing it first. If we want real conversations—about race, power, equity, or any challenging topic—we have to model openness.

3. It Creates Connection
   Sharing experiences, fears, and hopes reminds us that we’re not alone. Vulnerability helps break down barriers and builds a sense of community.

4. It Opens the Door for Learning
   Brave spaces aren’t about having all the answers. They’re about being willing to listen, unlearn, and grow. Admitting what we don’t know is the first step toward learning.

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How do I Show Vulnerability as a Facilitator

• I Share My Own Story – I tell stories about times I have struggled or learned something the hard way. I also share joyful moments as well as my love of laughter.

• I Admit When I Don’t Know Something –I don’t try to act like I have all the answers and I don’t indulge in perfectionism. I ask for help from my co-facilitator or from the people in the room.

• I Name and Show My Emotions – When I am feeling some kind of way, I speak on it. If I feel touched by something or someone, I say so. It normalizes expressing emotions.

• I Make Space For Other Ways of Be-ing– I try to leave space for silence, reflection, and different ways of expressing vulnerability. I also invite people to show up as best they can.

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Brave spaces aren’t created by avoiding discomfort—they’re built when people feel held enough to lean into it. Vulnerability is the key. When we embrace it, we invite others to do the same, making space for real transformation and collective growth.

Is your organization in need of a brave space, where everyone can feel tended to, seen and heard? Does your organization need to connect or reconnect with your community, community partners, board members, or co-workers? Contact me at Crystal Mason Consulting or contact us at Tree Of Change.

Let’s be brave together.

One of my cultural practices is to take conversations and turn them into poems. I do this mostly through a performance installation I call Chaos Poetry. I’ve been doing it for over a decade, and it is a way for me to reflect back to someone the power of their being.

I applied that same practice to the notes from our Beloved Community Rising gathering. What came from it is is more than just a poem. It is a map that details what is possible and how we get there.

One message rang clear through all our responses: We all have a part to play.

This post is cross-promoted on www.queerlycomplex.com.

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We all have a part to play.

There is a crisis of meaning for 
        we do not tell the truth of our history.
We do not call ourselves savages, 
        though our origins are savage.
We are filled with empty calories, 
        never discerning what to swallow or what to spit out.
Isolation keeps us disconnected;
        all flattens into The One Truth.
And the Right to Remain Silent also silences.
“Everybody can see what is happening.”

We all have a part to play.

Take a long, deep breath; exhale; 
        repeat.
Become aware of the rhythms of your body, 
        the curve of your spine.
Articulate. Twist. Curl. 
        Expand.
Soften your gaze; 
        blur edges together; 
        erase the borders between all.
Let flow thought & memory & dream & 
        be.
You are you whenever wherever 
        you are you whenever wherever…

We all have a part to play.

This is our medicine bag:
The mountains & chocolate & watercolors & protest 
        & cooking & learning & screaming & dancing 
        & slowness & strength & ease & sex 
        & an emotional support saw.

A community of expansive, inclusive care and belonging, of 
        trustworthy, loving people, of 
        solidarity across differences, of 
        people I don’t necessarily like, of 
        being without judgment, of 
        those who call me on my bullshit.

Deep, lasting commitments to reciprocity with land, to 
        passing through and not holding on, to 
        rest and self care, to making beautiful things, to 
        figuring out joy for myself and sharing it with others, to 
        being a source of connection, to bashing assholes over the head with granny’s cast 
        iron skillet.

We all have a part to play.

A closing in circle
A hug to our heart
Affirmed and hopeful
More calm inside
Love for all
Do not feel so alone
Grounded, supported, authentic foundation
“Everybody can see what is happening.”

And we all have a part to play.

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“Everybody can see what is happening,” is a quote from James and Grace Lee Boggs in Revolution and Evolution in the Twentieth Century, published in 1974 by Monthly Review Press Classics. It can be found on page 258.

"We are now faced with the fact that tomorrow is today. We are confronted with the fierce urgency of now."

These words from Dr. King echo powerfully as we navigate our current moment in history.

As a member of the Culture Tending Collective, I've been deeply reflecting on how our work intersects with Dr. King's vision of the Beloved Community. Our collective publishes the Culture Tending Commons, where we explore practices that help organizations and changemakers navigate complex social change. Today, I want to share how these practices can guide us through times when the very values we champion face mounting challenges.

Through our work in the Culture Tending Collective, we've identified that leadership requires both vision and vulnerability. This understanding emerges from our collective wisdom, shaped by diverse experiences and perspectives of our founding members - Crystal Mason, Vanessa Rodriguez, Jason Wyman (also known as Queerly Complex), and myself.

Dr. King's wisdom that "Power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic" deeply resonates with our approach. This balance is particularly significant for women of color in leadership positions, who navigate unique pressures to project unwavering strength while creating nurturing environments for their teams.

When a team member tears up during a meeting about potential funding cuts, when a community member shares their exhaustion, when a partner expresses anxiety about the future - these moments call us to what we in the Culture Tending Collective define as "Co-Creating Space & Time to Pause, Dream, & Be." These aren't moments of weakness; they're opportunities to demonstrate what true leadership looks like in an era that desperately needs new models of power.

Crystal Mason, a founding member of our collective, offers this wisdom: "A lot is put into our mouths, and we get to choose what we swallow and what we spit out." This discernment becomes essential as we guide our organizations through uncertainty while keeping our eyes on the horizon of possibility.

Dr. King spoke of the long arc of the moral universe bending toward justice. But that bend doesn't happen on its own - it requires intentional tending, collective dreaming, and the courage to create change while being changed by it. In the Culture Tending Collective, we call this moving at "the speed of collectivity," knowing when to pause for deeper understanding and when to move with decisive purpose.

Today, on this MLK Day, we're putting these principles into practice. The Culture Tending Collective is creating an intentional space called "Beloved Community Rising" where we can come together to explore these themes through meaningful connection and collective care. Because like Dr. King, we understand that we cannot walk alone. As he reminded us, "We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny."

Let us tend to this garment together, weaving strength with tenderness, power with love, and urgency with intentionality. For in doing so, we don't just honor Dr. King's legacy - we actively participate in bringing his dream closer to reality.

Beloved Community Rising: An Evening of Connection and Renewal

• Date: TODAY! MLK Day (January 20th)

• Time: 4-6pm PST// 6-8pm CST // 7-9pm PST

• Location: Zoom

• Limited spots available.

  Join the Gathering

Drawing inspiration from Dr. King's vision of the Beloved Community, we're gathering to honor his legacy through meaningful connection and collective care. This special day offers a sanctuary where those dedicated to social change can:

• Share experiences and wisdom in a supportive environment that honors our full humanity

• Explore somatic practices and creative expression to process our collective challenges

• Reimagine possibilities for our communities through collective dreaming and dialogue

Through guided activities, meaningful conversation, and creative exploration, we'll nurture the connections that sustain our work for justice and equity. Together, we'll create space to acknowledge our struggles while rekindling the hope and determination that drives our commitment to positive change.

RSVP TODAY

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Culture Tending Commons Equity Statement

We are committed to dismantling systems of oppression and supporting movements for self-determination.

We affirm the inherent worth and dignity of all individuals, centering principles of consent, autonomy, and agency while standing in solidarity with movements for land back, abolition, reparations, labor rights, bodily autonomy, and more.

We believe that true liberation is a collective effort, requiring mutual care and the active co-creation of a just world.

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Below I share details about each of the exchanges and then a bit of personal history about my roots tending to collective culture.

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2025 Peer Exchanges

Culture Tending Collective & Commons

January, April, July, November 2025

SUBSCRIBE TO CULTURE TENDING COMMONS to receive registration in your inbox!

Grounding all of the following incredible Peer Exchanges with others are ones that the Culture Tending Collective will be hosting for our community of comrades and Culture Tenders. We will begin with a Space for Dreaming and Discerning in January 2025 post the US Presidential Inauguration. The goal is to give our beings personally and collectively space to pause, dream, and be. This will aid us in discerning what paths we may want to cultivate in 2025.

We will then be hosting three different Peer Exchanges on the What, Why, and How of Culture Tending. In the month prior, we will be launching a Culture Tending Art / Media Activity on Culture Tending Commons, our online platform and publication. We will encourage readers to SUBMIT their art / media, and we will use those submissions as a launching off point for the Peer Exchange. After the exchange is over, we will publish a summary of the event with notes, art / media, and actions that can further our personal and collective understanding of the core concepts of culture tending. It is our way of unflattening perspective and cultivating a more plural understanding of how we talk about and experience the behaviors, patterns, and systems of culture tending.

In Fall 2025, the Culture Tending Collective will host a virtual convening inviting all who have participated in Peer Exchanges to help us co-create more nuance and cultural specificity to our model. The conversation, art / media, and relations gathered and tended to will inform our work for 2026.

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Filthy Studios X Queerly Complex

January, March, May 2025 - Invite Only

Filthy Studios Founder Fivestar and Jason Wyman / Queerly Complex are hosting THREE Peer Exchanges about Project 2025, the adult industry, and how we collectively organize to fight for free expression and sexual liberation.

The First Peer Exchange will focus on understanding and making meaning of what we collectively know about the aims of Project 2025 in censoring, legislating, and politically attacking the intersectional issues of the adult industry, free expression, and trans and queer rights. We will be convening performers, content creators, and advocates with the aim of producing a collective resource guide adult industry professionals (and their allies) can use to help inform their neighbors about the issues impacting our communities. The guide will include a summary of the Peer Exchange, some suggested collective actions, articles, videos, or podcasts that provide deeper analysis, and mutual aid groups to support or get involved with. The goal is a more informed, connected, and mutually supportive network within the adult industry that can be activated and nimbly respond to legislative attacks that may be coming from the Trump administration (and as clearly outlined in Project 2025.)

The two additional Peer Exchanges will be shaped after the first one is hosted in early January.

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EARTH Lab SF X Queerly Complex

February, April, June 2025 -RSVPs coming soon.

EARTH Lab SF (Beth Stephens) and Jason Wyman / Queerly Complex are hosting THREE Peer Exchanges at the new 465 Collective Space to harness the peer power of San Francisco Bay Area Queer Artists to co-create survival tactics, tools, and frameworks.

We, as queer / dyke / fag artists, know that our art / work / collections have been, continue to be, and will likely always be censored by domination, oppression, and tyranny. We will think, dream, and work together to develop tactics that ensure our being / art / work survives these attacks. Each Peer Exchange in this series focuses on a different aspect of queer / dyke / fag survival and uses arts-based activities to generate collective wisdom. We will gather our results into an online resource guide with the participants' consent. This guide will feature a summary of the Peer Exchanges, art activities to aid personal and collective exploration, and suggested material and actions for deeper understanding and analysis. We will autonomously and collectively take action to ensure queer / dyke / fag art / artists are more interconnected, documented, and their work shared, so that it / we survive long into the future.

TOPIC ONE: Strategies for Hope and Joy - How do we remain hopeful and practice joy even while under assault? Using the concept of a "recipe card," we will invite all who attend to create their recipe for hope and joy, sharing "ingredients" and "actions" with others. We will compile the recipe cards into a mini cookbook, "The Hope & Joy of Cooking," and publish it via the Culture Tending Commons. Our "cookbook" will be a fabulous outreach and organizing tool, which we will share with other LGBTQIA+ community centers throughout the South and Midwest to convey our collective resources and start strengthening alliances between more rural and urban queers / dykes / fags.

TOPIC TWO: Queer Life Social Security - What kinds of security do we queers need to live (and thrive) in this oppressive world? This question will be the featured topic of our second Peer Exchange, where we will craft our Personal Social Security Cards. We can display these cards should we find ourselves in a place of insecurity or emergency. They will remind us of who we are, what to do, and who to rely on in case of emergency. E.A.R.T.H. Lab SF and Queerly Complex will compile the tactics, ideas, and strategies generated through this exercise into a Queer Security Tip Sheet and publish it via the Culture Tending Commons. We will also be sharing all of our backend organizing tactics so other queers / dykes / fags can facilitate similar conversations and collective knowledge generation in their communities.

TOPIC THREE: Queer Autonomous Zones for Self Determination - What are the shapes-boundaries of your personal space? How do we negotiate spaces for movement collectively? Participants at this Peer Exchange will begin by using masking tape to define the edges of their personal space. We will then use these edges and physical marks to dig deeper into how we take up and move through sites personally and collectively. We will then distill our conversation into maps, charts, and diagrams that inspire conversations about autonomy, personal and political space, self-determination, and movement. We will publish the results (with consent) via the Culture Tending Commons. Additionally, E.A.R.T.H. Lab SF and Queerly Complex will compile all the maps, charts, and diagrams along with the activity instructions and share them with other organizers, teaching artists, and facilitators to aid them in their classrooms, organizing, and conflict mediation.

Stay tuned to Queerly Complex for how to register.

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AAACC X Tree of Change

February, April, June 2025 - Client-facing

As part of Tree of Change with Crystal Mason, we will be working with the African American Art and Culture Complex to host THREE Peer Exchange Dinners for specific communities crucial the the long-term success and survival of the AAACC and Black Artists in San Francisco. Each dinner will bring together a curated group of individuals to tackle pressing issues such as ensuring cultural autonomy, strengthening local Black arts institutions, and queering the archive. Each will embrace a different art form, and art / work created over dinner will be added to the AAACC's #WeAreBlackDreams Archive to guide its strategic planning process in 2025 and beyond. A final report summarizing all Peer Exchanges, art activities, and art / work collected will be co-published on the Culture Tending Commons.

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To stay informed and get invitations to the Peer Exchanges, please make sure to SUBSCRIBE to Culture Tending Commons.

“We Are Youth Workers” was produced by the Youth Development Peer Network in 2008.

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"Power through a network of peers."

That was the tagline for an organization I co-directed called the Youth Development Peer Network / Youth Worker: Collective. It was founded by Community Network for Youth Development as part of a Learning Circle model bringing people from all parts of the burgeoning Youth Development Sector together to learn from one another. It started with cohort members, and then quickly grew to be its own project. That's when I joined as a participant and then as an Steering Committee member under the leadership of Jen Fornal.

Jen didn't work directly with young people, and so there was a mismatch between the convener of the space and the people for whom the space was convened. We solved that by moving to a Co-Chair model, and I was one of the first two Co-Chairs along with Rebecca Goldberg. I represented those working directly with youth through implementing youth development programs at the OMI / Excelsior Beacon Center at Denman Middle School here in San Francisco.

The Youth Development Peer Network did amazing work that advanced the peer-based praxis of youth development across the Bay Area, California, and even the United States. We were one of only a handful of networks / coalitions within the USA that had direct worker engagement in leadership and strategic direction. Everything we produced brought together all strata of the field (e.g. youth, tutors, coaches, program leaders, managers, directors, case managers, health practitioners, funders, policymakers, librarians, teaching artists, you-name-it) as equal players within the spaces that we held / facilitated. There were no experts. There was just us-all. And together we co-created collective understanding, meaning making, and wisdom.

We were so successful at gathering a network of peers that we became sought after by policymakers across the United States to give our "Stamp of Approval" on Youth Development Competencies and subsequent training and reporting mechanisms. We engaged, and we explicitly stated that our involvement was conditioned on continued involvement in the evolving understanding and meaning making of youth development, which we saw as dynamic and not static.

Everyone, though, was only interested in a very specific and immoveable "stamp" that could determine whether programs got funding or not. And we found our work being used as a measuring stick, which we did not intend for it to become. The state has a way of taking what is collective and turning it into a club that bashes you into compliance. The Youth Development Peer Network did not survive in large part because we refused to participate in the transformation of our work into a club.

I was in my mid-20s and early 30s during this time, and when the Youth Development Peer Network became undone, I too found myself adrift. I had poured years into a distributive, shared leadership networking model for a field I helped form only to have the state and funders shift key directions, which made funding our work impossible. In my last year as Co-Director, I worked for eight months without pay because the City delayed contracts and we only had enough money to pay for one Co-Director, so that salary went to the other Co-Director, Yas Ahmed. By the end of that year with no additional funding and not a single previous funder supporting our distributive work (claiming, "it was too risky;" it wasn't expert-driven;" "we are in a period of contraction;" and "you achieved your outcomes: the field now has standards") we made the difficult decision to halt all operations.

I learned a lot from the Youth Development Peer Network about how to hold and facilitate intergenerational, multiracial, gender-affirming, anti-capitalist space using somatic- and arts-based praxis. Instead of applying it to a field like Youth Development, I dedicated myself to the advancement of a CO-CREATIVE PRAXIS AS ART FORM. Some call this social practice art. I call it, "The Art of Relating to One's Self, Each Other, and the Cosmic Mysteries."

This shift in focus yielded some incredible art, media, performance, and organizing projects over the last 15 years, including 14 Black Poppies (co-founded with Margaret Bacon Schulze), #WhereDoYouBelong Project with OutLook Theater Project, TILT, and a number of other artists and organizations, #StickyQuestions with Celi Tayamo Lee and Mary Claire Amable for the Asian Art Museum, the Alliance (for Media Arts & Culture) Youth Media Network with Myah Overstreet, and now the Immigrant Artist Network co-founded with Rupy C. Tut, Tree of Change with Crystal Mason, and the Culture Tending Collective with Crystal, Vanessa Rodriguez Minero, and Wendy Martinez-Morroquin. Each co-created project is (and has been) managed / run collectively using consensus-based decision-making with all who participate.

“Where do you Belong” was a video created in 2014 for the #WhereDoYouBelong Project.

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From Peer-based to Peer Exchanges

In 2025, I am applying all of what I've learned over the last 20+ years of peer-based praxis to a new form called Peer Exchanges. Peer Exchanges are In Person or Virtual spaces where people gather in community to exchange information, ideas, questions, and beliefs around a specific topic towards generating collective knowledge and wisdom so as to unflatten perspectives, unearth roots, discover intersectionality, and cultivate interdependence. Each Peer Exchange is co-created by and centers the communities being gathered.

There are no experts in a Peer Exchange. Instead, every participant offers their own expertise towards making collective meaning of subjects that are intentionally flattened by media, money, and power. The goal is to leave a Peer Exchange with a more complex understanding of both the topic and our peers, so we can engage with the world around us in more nuanced and compassionate ways that lead us towards our collective liberation from shame, punishment, domination, oppression, and tyranny.

Every Peer Exchange results in some sort of documentation of collective insight that will be shared on Culture Tending Commons. Culture Tending Commons is an online portal, publication, and community of comrades dedicated to co-creating and promulgating antidotes to White Supremacy Culture. It is founded by Crystal Mason, Vanessa Rodriguez Minero, and Wendy Martinez-Morroquin, and me. Throughout 2025, we will be posting resources co-created by our collective members, facilitating virtual dialogue to deepen understanding and meaning, and sharing adaptations / applications / activities of culture tending strategies, qualities, processes, and tools (aka praxis) that encourage others to use and remix and, thus, co-create their own meaning. It is a space of plurality full of camaraderie, contradiction, and complexity.

As Queerly Complex, I am working with four different co-creators in the Spring of 2025 to co-produce Peer Exchanges for specific groups, organizations, businesses, or movements to generate collective wisdom around a particular topic. I will be working with Filthy Studios, EARTH Lab SF, the African American Art & Culture Complex (through Tree of Change), and the Culture Tending Collective! The insights from each will be shared, and we will be hosting a virtual convening in the Fall 2025 to make meaning of the combined insights across the incredibly diverse communities.

Please make sure to sign up for the CULTURE TENDING COMMONS to learn more and become a part of a community of comrades dedicated to promulgating antidotes to White Supremacy Culture.

If you would like to HIRE ME to produce Peer Exchanges for your organization, company, or movement, please EMAIL ME at jason [at] queerlycomplex [dot] com.

You can find a copy of the slideshow in the Webinar here.

If you would like to know more about our definition of Culture Tending and its Characteristics, please read this.

Over the course of our combined lives on this abundant planet, we have co-created with frontline COVID responders across California facilitating equitable access to vaccines; Black, Brown, Queer, and Trans laborers organizing their unions; Black, Immigrant, Queer, and Trans artists and creatives seeking peer-based personal and professional development; intergenerational, multi-racial, cross-geographic youth media practitioners collectively (re)defining media, literacy, and co-creation towards pluralistic understanding. Our intersectional communities and innovative approach towards Culture Tending ensures that our praxis is highly participatory, adaptive, and generative, resulting in wider and deeper understanding and meaning-making. 

We invite you to read, question, reflect, and make your own meaning inspired by (Some) Emerging Culture Tending Definitions and Characteristics. We know they become stronger, more adaptive, and wider spread the more each of us contributes to our personal and collective understanding. 

AND! Please JOIN SHARE OUR POST! 

We will be publishing short videos and adaptive resources, facilitating peer exchanges, and hosting a day-long virtual retreat in 2025. Our goal is to co-create a small, engaged community of diverse, intersectional Culture Tenders and harness our collective wisdom towards articulating a pluralistic Culture Tending Praxis of collective liberation. 

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SOME EMERGING DEFINITIONS

Culture Tending

Culture Tending is both a concept and a set of emerging, adaptive practices (aka a Praxis) that aid individuals, groups, and organizations in reflecting upon their current culture, dreaming of ones they desire, and co-creating pathways towards cultures that foster mutual exchange, care, and support. 

Our practices of Culture Tending cultivate safe, valued, and connected environments through establishing shared values, norms, and practices that counteract White Supremacy Culture. In our work individually, collectively, and with our clients, we have witnessed how intentionally tending to our culture leads to spaces that encourage vulnerability, conversation, meaning-making, cooperation, and pluralism. This, in turn, helps us face these often chaotic and constantly changing times in ways that affirm:
We All Belong.  

Our Culture Tending Praxis integrates participatory action research, peer-based education, somatics, and social practice art making into a process that disrupts biased thinking and patterns, facilitates introspection and reflection, and generates collective dreaming, wisdom, and growth. 

It helps our diverse, intergenerational, and multi-racial group and clients navigate complex social dynamics and empowers all to apply these practices in our daily lives. 

The resulting tools and frameworks are adaptable and foster the creation of braver, safer, more accessible spaces that prioritize equity, care, and respect in our personal lives, with each other, and in our communities. By continuously tending to our culture, we co-create sustainable, generative, more inclusive environments that move us further and further away from the harmful norms of White Supremacy Culture.

Praxis

Praxis is a process of articulating personal, familial, cultural, and / or systemic behaviors, beliefs, values, knowledge, and practices and applying them towards personal, collective, and / or systemic change, actions, and / or outcomes. Praxis can be represented as a path with guideposts that aid you (singular and / or plural) in understanding when or where you may be veering away from who or how you desire to be. Praxis offers opportunities and mechanisms by which to pause, dream, and be, so that you can move from reacting to change to responding to it in ways that deepen understanding and better align intentions to impact.     

White Supremacy Culture

White Supremacy Culture is a culture of racism centered around the belief that whiteness is superior to all. It is defined by a legal system designed to privilege white people and their rights to property (land, intellectual, and otherwise) in education and research, health and wellness, politics and economics, norms and standards, arts and culture, and storytelling and history. 

It is maintained by characteristics of:

• "fear, 

• “one right way, 

• “either / or & the binary, 

• “denial & defensiveness, 

• “right to comfort & fear of conflict, 

• “individualism, 

• “progress is more & quantity over quality, 

• “worship of the written word, and 

• “urgency." 

We believe and know that everyone has the capacity to perpetuate White Supremacy Culture, and undoing White Supremacy Culture begins with acknowledging its existence and naming how and where it shows up in our personal lives, organizations, and society while simultaneously co-creating / re-creating ways of gathering and be-ing in community free from White Supremacy Culture.

This definition was crafted for AllThrive Education’s Virtual Dream Retreats for The Center at Sierra Health’s COVID Vaccine Equity Cohort. 

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SOME EMERGING CHARACTERISTICS

Honoring Personal Experiences & Pluralistic Expressions (aka Whole Being) 

We believe that we show up as whole people with unique, personal experiences that are expressed in a multitude of ways. Sometimes there are synergies between our personal and collective expressions. Other times there are dissonances. Both offer opportunities to practice how we more wholly make collective meaning and expand or deepen our understanding rather than reduce, silence, or shrink. By honoring both personal experiences and pluralistic expressions, we unflatten perspective and cultivate possibility. 

This can be an antidote to White Supremacy Culture because it addresses its characteristics of “one right way,” “either / or & the binary,” and “individualism.”  

Co-Creating Space & Time to Pause, Dream, & Be 

We are constantly on the go. Our attention is always being demanded by our relatives and neighbors and friends, our jobs and bosses, our society and its mores, our media and technology, and our internal world. Everything around us demands we consume, consume, consume. We know this is manufactured as a means to keep us distracted and divided, constantly hungry while full on empty calories. 

We believe taking a moment to pause makes space to dream, which gives us time to (simply) be. This can be an antidote to White Supremacy Culture because it provides an opening to disrupt feelings of “fear” and “urgency.”  

Facilitating Reflection, Introspection, & Intentionality

When we have time to be, we can better reflect upon who we’ve been, who we are, and who we want to be. This process of introspection facilitates identifying intentions that can aid us in better articulating a path towards our desired futures and collective dreams. When practiced together, reflection, introspection, and intentionality can aid us in better understanding when the impact of our actions is not reflective of our intentions. 

This can be an antidote to White Supremacy Culture because it reduces reactionary “denial & defensiveness” and  it eases its characteristic of a “right to comfort & fear of conflict.”

Naming Power Structures, Cultural Dynamics, & Decision-Making Processes (aka Discernment)

Power exists everywhere, and its structure and enforcement has numerous cultural dynamics that play out in how we consider and then make decisions. By better knowing the path we are on and where we want to be heading, we can more clearly see and name when power structures and cultural dynamics may be influencing our decision making. The act of naming something is a way of creating the possibility to change it. This is also known as discernment, or as Crystal Mason reminds our collective, “A lot is put into our mouths, and we get to choose what we swallow and what we spit out.” 

This can be an antidote to White Supremacy Culture because it undermines its characteristics of the “right to comfort & fear of conflict” and “progress is more & quantity over quality.”  

Willing to Change, to Create It & Be Changed by It

White Supremacy Culture is a constant because it is in every structure we come into contact with. Change is also a constant. When we walk a path / way towards liberation we must be willing to change, especially when we notice characteristics of White Supremacy Culture asserting themselves. An unwillingness to change simply reinforces its characteristics and advances it. A first step then is to not just be willing to change, but to both create the change you desire and to be changed by that change.        

This can be an antidote to White Supremacy Culture because it undoes its characteristics of “one right way,” “either / or & the binary,” and “progress is more & quantity over quality.”

Moving at the Speed of Collectivity 

While change begets change, which can instigate a process of being, introspection, and discernment, it is also crucial to remember the purpose of Culture Tending: to actually co-create change. That requires taking collective actions. Moving at the speed of collectivity means that while we desire to cultivate trust and ensure mutual understanding through consensus-informed approaches, sometimes the best way to discover both resonance and / or dissonance is to take action. Then, respond to the ripples of those actions. This means sometimes we move slowly with deep intention and lots of space for pluralistic understanding to develop. And sometimes we must act quickly in order to meet a deadline or get something created that we all can then edit, modify, or adapt. There is no one specific speed to collectivity. Rather, speed is informed by the guideposts set on our path / way.    

This can be an antidote to White Supremacy Culture because it uproots rugged “individualism,” abolishes “one right way,” and dispels “fear.”  

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BIOS

CRYSTAL MASON 

Crystal Mason (one half of Tree of Change) is a dedicated activist, artist, cultural worker, mediator, and consultant committed to fostering spaces for envisioning and realizing a more just and equitable world. With over three decades of experience, Crystal's work traverses the intersections of race, gender, class, ability, sexuality, art, and culture. With a wealth of experience and a steadfast commitment to equity and justice, Crystal Mason continues to inspire and empower through their multifaceted activism, artistry, & advocacy.

VANESSA RODRIGUEZ MINERO 

Vanessa Rodriguez Minero is responsible for coordinating the AllThrive Education team and developing a healthy work culture. Prior to AllThrive Education they worked in city government as a constituent liaison, led recruitment efforts for a national storytelling campaign on IPS and DACA, and supported grants processing at a philanthropy.

They studied government and Mexican American Studies at UT Austin and learned about community care and vulnerable strength from their time as an undocu youth organizer. They believe that the tools and strategies for collective liberation already exist: in the hearts, wisdom, care, & imagination of BIPOC communities.

WENDY MARTINEZ MORROQUIN

In 2018, Wendy Martinez-Morroquin co-founded AllThrive Education in direct response to first-hand discrimination and violence she experienced as an unaccompanied, undocumented immigrant, and in gratitude of the healing and support she received from community organizations. Wendy has 7+ years of experience facilitating empathic learning spaces that enable courageous self-inquiry and holistic growth. She has trained hundreds of city employees, educators, and prospective adoptive parents in equity, inclusion, implicit bias, and cross-cultural relationship and trust building.

Wendy holds a degree in Peace and Conflict Studies from the University of California Berkeley, a certificate in teaching Yoga Therapeutics & is a trained Restorative Justice practitioner.

JASON WYMAN

Jason Wyman, also known as Queerly Complex (and one half of Tree of Change and a consultant with AllThrive Education), was born upon the Land of 10,000 Lakes on what E is coming to know as Turtle Island, who has settled on Yelamu, which is also called San Francisco.

Jason's name means healer, or so he's been told since a young child, and they did not believe it until Eir father, Michael (Mike) James Wyman, and him mended their selves and one another as Mike died of mantle cell non-Hodgkin's lymphoma across a screen and a country over all of 2020. What E has come to understand as the significance of his name is that healer does not mean healed or (even) healing. Rather, it is a positionality within the cosmos that allows one's self to change & be changed by all that unfolds.

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